Moving Abroad Means Moving Forward
Why We’re Not Keeping a House, storing or shipping
When we made the decision to move overseas, we had originally thought about keeping a house here in the states. However, we’ve heard enough stories and talked to enough people who actually did this to decide that it wasn’t for us. The headache of it is too great. Also, we currently own a rental in the states that we’re also selling. It’s already a headache as it’s an hour from where we live. So, having to drive over to the house because a tenant clogged the kitchen sink is a pain. I can’t imagine the problems and expenses if we lived half a world away.
So, we’re not keeping a house and we don’t want to pay for storage for stuff we won’t be using for who knows how long – if ever. It makes no sense. Plus, are we committing to this or are we trying to leave ourselves a big avenue of retreat if we don’t like it? I would rather take the Hernán Cortés approach and “burn the ships”. In other words, fully commit.
The next alternative is shipping… and how much you want to ship. Preparing for an international move isn’t, of course, like moving across town. You can’t just rent a truck, pack it full, and haul it to the next place. Shipping overseas is expensive, storage is impractical, and space is limited. That means every item has to pass a test: Does it belong in our future, or does it stay in the past?
We had decided that we didn’t want to ship a whole container and when I looked into what it would cost to ship just a few things it turns out it’s anywhere from $3800 to $5000 dollars. This gets you about 12 standard moving boxes of stuff shipped. For us, it didn’t justify the cost. What’s cheaper is just taking extra luggage. If I pay even an extra $100 for each piece, then I could take a dozen suitcases and still only spend $1200.
Last night, I sold my piano. It was the one I’d inherited from my dad, the same piano my kids grew up playing and learning on. It would be more touching if I could honestly write that letting it go was one of the hardest steps so far; like parting with a piece of family history, a thread woven into our story. Honestly though, it was pretty easy parting with it and it actually made me a little more excited to have moved such a big piece of our furniture out. It was more like, “We’re really doing this!” Still, I can hold onto the memories it created. Now, it’ll make new memories for another family.
Why Decluttering Feels Different Before an Overseas Move
Decluttering always has its challenges, but doing it in preparation for an international move carries extra weight:
Every item must be considered in terms of cost, space, and lifestyle.
The things you bring kind of define your new start—what you’ll see and use every day in a new country.
Each choice forces you to ask: Does this support the life we’re creating, or anchor us to the one we’re leaving?
Our Three Categories — Keep, Sell, Let Go
To stay sane, we’ve broken our decluttering into three buckets:
Keep
Family heirlooms and meaningful photos.
Essential documents (all backed up digitally).
Tech and travel gear that will be invaluable in an expat lifestyle. Admittedly, this is a category for pretty much just me. My wife isn’t the tech/gadget type.
A small number of sentimental items that connect us to our story without weighing us down.
Sell
Furniture: We’ll buy whatever we need when we’re living in Portugal. I suspect we won’t need as much in a smaller, walkable lifestyle. What I do buy there I’m going to want to be of good quality - not a used couch I just shipped overseas.
Big-ticket items like our cars (before the move, these will be major milestones).
Duplicates and things that can be easily replaced once we’re abroad.
Tools. This is a harder one for me as a man. I like to build things, fix things and be the guy you can depend on to do so. I have everything from a table saw, router, nail guns, wrenches of all types, painting supplies, etc…. What is a man without his tools? I’m about to find out. Honestly, it makes me feel a little useless. I suspect, I’ll be buying new tools in Europe. But, it really doesn’t make sense to ship them.
Let Go (Donate/Recycle/Trash)
Clothes we don’t wear and things that don’t “spark joy.”
Paper clutter that’s already been digitized. I spent the better part of 2 days digitizing a couple of stacks of paperwork.
Household items that served us well here but won’t serve us in our new life. Letting the kitchen items go is a little hard but all the appliances are on 110v and wouldn’t work in Europe anyway.
The Lessons Hidden in the Letting Go
Decluttering for a move like this has taught us lessons we didn’t expect:
Letting go of things is letting go of old versions of ourselves.
It’s freeing to realize we don’t need as much as we thought. This is easily more true for me than it is for my wife who moved in with me 12 years ago with only what she and her two children could pack in her Subaru for ONE trip. Seriously.
By stripping back, we’re creating room—not just in our luggage, but in our lives—for what comes next.
Selling my piano was a reminder of those lessons. But it also reminded me that what really matters isn’t the object itself—it’s the memories, the music, and the way it shaped our family. Those come with us, even if the piano doesn’t.
Practical Tips for Decluttering Before a Move
If you’re facing a similar journey, here are a few tips we’ve found helpful:
Start early. Decluttering always takes longer than you think.
Digitize. Scan photos, documents, even old letters so you can keep the memories without the bulk. I scanned a lot of photos. One, of my brother and me when we were kids, I framed and gave to my brother (after scanning it for myself of course).
Use the one-year rule. If you haven’t used it in a year, chances are you don’t need it. This rule has gotten stricter as time goes by. Meaning, I went from 1 year to 6 months and now it’s more like, 3 months – except for clothes.
Know your resources for selling items. We use Facebook Marketplace and “Buy Nothing” groups. I have also sold items to friends when they’ve asked, “So, are you selling that workbench?” As a matter of fact…
Picture your future home. Will it fit your new space and lifestyle? If not, let it go.
Closing Reflection
Decluttering isn’t just about boxes and storage—it’s about moving forward. Every item we keep, sell, or let go is part of a larger story of transition. As bittersweet as it can be, we’re finding that the process of letting go is also the process of making space for something new.
Portugal is calling, and as we lighten our load, we’re preparing not just for a move, but for a whole new chapter.
